After - David Hay

In the crystalline sorrow of tears

Grief takes centre stage.

Without you mother I am lost,

No more will you map out the course of my life

Or offer me Gin and Tonic when reality is too much,

So I avoid your room, your clothes, the recipes you made.

What I wouldn’t give for peanut butter and lettuce sandwiches

And that morning tea with too much sugar,

What I wouldn’t give for scampi and chips (even though I’m Vegan now)

Or bored evenings watching Pride and Prejudice and North and South,

What I wouldn’t give for time to be ruled as my demesne;

To recall with autobiographical certainty

Every hour witnessed under these northern skies.

In search of lost time

I measure my memories inch by inch

To try and save your character from being lost to the dark,

But even now in the fresh aftermath

I struggle to recall the woman you were

When both of us thought we had too much time.

Bio:

David Hay is an English Teacher in the Northwest of England. He has written poetry and prose since the age of 18 when he discovered Virginia Woolf's The Waves and the poetry of John Keats. These and other artists encouraged him to seek his own poetic voice. He has currently been accepted for publication in Dreich, Abridged, Acumen, The Honest Ulsterman, The Dawntreader, Versification, The Stone of Madness Press, The Fortnightly Review, Nine Muses Poetry, Green Ink Poetry, Dodging the Rain, The Morning Star as well as The New River Press 2020 Anthology.